Mighty Mouse and Banana Man were received with a wide grin and an eager ear. Then Labyrinth unfolded before me, King Jareth's commanding, mesmerizing androgyny opening my eyes to what I considered interesting and sexy. Monty Python was taboo for many Catholic reasons, but I snuck it in whenever possible, it's members in my Comedy Hall of Famery-ing forever.
The Beatles blared from our living room speakers, we danced and sang along with genuine, raucous abandon (some of the best memories I have). Oasis and Radiohead appeared on the radar in my teen years (replace dancing with writing angsty/smutty manifestos in my journal), helping me through heartache and awkwardness eloquently. Are You Being Served?, Fawlty Towers, The Young Ones, Little Britain, Coupling, Spaced and my newest favorite, Skins all have a special stronghold in my living lexicon of entertainment and enjoyment (there's a few hundred others, a condensed list for time and sanity). The exuded cheeky class, relaxed off-beat sophistication and rebellious, level-headed aloof, make my heart palpitate. The majority of men on my Top Ten of All Time list are from across the pond (faster still, my heart doth beat). I am instantly intrigued by anything as soon as it's determined to be of English origin.
My name is Lola, and I'm an Anglophile.
Not one to be overly obsessive geek-girl (alright, not as outwardly then), when it comes to ol' Blighty, I'm smitten and all a-slobber. It's a word.
My fondness stems from the comfort of that which I knew daily, concretely in another life, it feels. Perhaps a parallel life to the one I have now. It's comforting to feel part of witty verbal earnestness, to witness reveling in a tradition of intelligence and nothing is sacred-ness (with a dash of everything IS sacred-ness). Even the lowest brow is set pretty high, no pandering or talking-down-to happening. It's all very natural and easy-peasy, yet should a fight or cause to rise against occur, irreverently as a people, they're on it like a bonnet.
There's a tea break/pub stint to shake loose monotony, neither of which is a bad idea, ever. There's far less squeamishness with nudity, controversial issues or personal relating. A chivalry and decency and dignity with all that truly matters, and a "fuck-all!" to everything else. That just ain't part of our heritage so much. America is the teenager of the world, England the knowing older sibling, chuckling and shaking it's head at our rowdy, misguided antics. A refreshing escape, one I take frequently with fervor.
Sadly and wrongly, I've never visited, and my few sordid interludes with actual English imports here were not as awe-inspiring as I had always/often fantasized. I have a theory as to why, one meant analytically. Foreign types who come to the U S of A are usually pursuing the American "way of life", assimilation to that end being the very same issue I have with many fellow Americans. Cut-throat competitiveness, material fixation, shallow wanker-itis, to site a few. Not everyone that comes to our soil is that way nor are everyone that inhabit it, but it makes sense, like attracts like.
Anyway, I'm assuming that's what kept me and the random few Brits from skipping down the road arm in arm, singing God Save the Queen whilst sprinkling scones like parade candy. That must be why.
Like the post I wrote in response to my New York trip and how I feel for California (Bi-Coastal), there's never any lack of respect or love for where I am currently. I love America for what it is, I just have an awakened sense of understanding somewhere else. I feel that with every song, show or syllable I take delight in.
When I voyage to the iconic island itself, I'll fare well with the people there-they're juice from the root, one I've long felt rooted akin to. As life imitates art, my propensity for all things English will translate a connection in many ways. Can't wait to pop 'round and see.
Monday, July 26, 2010
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Rectitude
We need to be our own Sassy Gay Friend, that's all there is to it. If you know not of whom I speak, head to thesecondcitynetwork.com/You Tube, check it out, and compile a list of people (outside of the rare and glorious real friends you might have, cherish them) that would be as candid with you in an hour of crucial decision making. Or that hilarious while doing it.
Honesty isn't the best policy anymore, or when it is, it's callously misinterpreted to suit our personal needs, spare us unwanted interaction or help us gain something. I've been beating my brains out lately trying to figure out exactly why we do this to ourselves and others. Laziness? Fear of confrontation? Defense mechanism? Selfishness? I suspect it's all of the above. What the what and why the why, I ask.
EVERYONE does it, we're all a link in the spiral of shame. I accepted a dinner invitation from a random dude at the park the other day. He didn't trip my trigger physically, nor personality wise, and the verbal exchange was weak to say the least. He didn't even introduce himself before getting digits (ones that I could have fudged as an easy out but never do out of habit I guess, psssh). He then proceeded to imply by tone of voice what would be happening in exchange for sushi. Yuck and double yuck. Needless to say I declined later, and scoffed at the subsequent blatant booty text the next night. "I'm not interested, but thanks. Approaching me took guts though, good job." That's how that could have gone, but it's a park frequented often, and no doubt I'll run into him again, therefor I felt obligated to spare the potential rejection awkwardness of it all. So I pretended, kicking myself ever since.
According to the general study of humans I informally conduct, when you do let the truth fly, it's detrimental somewhere down the line, and that's the deciding factor above all else. The collective stigma isn't on being honest so much as having to deal with that person in the future, in light of your real feelings or thoughts. By telling them what you think, you open your thought process and opinions to them, and in effect that friend/person will know where you stand, and either shy away or rebel against you accordingly. So it's easier to just say what they want to hear or skirt the issue and not have to sort out the messy, draining details.
Every time you let a good friend out of the house wearing an unflattering get-up despite any dubious queries for your input or omit pertinent facts to receive money/a service/material gain from someone the truth bending isn't for them, it's for you. Selfish and jaded much? Yeah, somehow we are.
Couple that with the human need for acceptance by everyone and their teacup poodle, its obvious how this all came down, even as we ignore indefinitely. I decided to challenge myself to fix it from my end. If we can all band together to "go green" we can all "go real", too.
Those individuals-you know who they are/if you are one-that ring loudest and clearest when relating do so by tactfully revealing thoughts and constructively evaluating situations without fear or delusional misgivings clouding their head. It's not what you say, it's how you say it. If we pass that down to even the simplest interactions, and trust in our perspective in that moment, we can dig a tunnel to truth and be set free. If what you say is meant to help, any momentary offense will be forgotten when they come out the other side, better for it.
In other words, "Probity ain't just fun on a Saturday night, it's a way of life." You know, something sassy like that.
Honesty isn't the best policy anymore, or when it is, it's callously misinterpreted to suit our personal needs, spare us unwanted interaction or help us gain something. I've been beating my brains out lately trying to figure out exactly why we do this to ourselves and others. Laziness? Fear of confrontation? Defense mechanism? Selfishness? I suspect it's all of the above. What the what and why the why, I ask.
EVERYONE does it, we're all a link in the spiral of shame. I accepted a dinner invitation from a random dude at the park the other day. He didn't trip my trigger physically, nor personality wise, and the verbal exchange was weak to say the least. He didn't even introduce himself before getting digits (ones that I could have fudged as an easy out but never do out of habit I guess, psssh). He then proceeded to imply by tone of voice what would be happening in exchange for sushi. Yuck and double yuck. Needless to say I declined later, and scoffed at the subsequent blatant booty text the next night. "I'm not interested, but thanks. Approaching me took guts though, good job." That's how that could have gone, but it's a park frequented often, and no doubt I'll run into him again, therefor I felt obligated to spare the potential rejection awkwardness of it all. So I pretended, kicking myself ever since.
According to the general study of humans I informally conduct, when you do let the truth fly, it's detrimental somewhere down the line, and that's the deciding factor above all else. The collective stigma isn't on being honest so much as having to deal with that person in the future, in light of your real feelings or thoughts. By telling them what you think, you open your thought process and opinions to them, and in effect that friend/person will know where you stand, and either shy away or rebel against you accordingly. So it's easier to just say what they want to hear or skirt the issue and not have to sort out the messy, draining details.
Every time you let a good friend out of the house wearing an unflattering get-up despite any dubious queries for your input or omit pertinent facts to receive money/a service/material gain from someone the truth bending isn't for them, it's for you. Selfish and jaded much? Yeah, somehow we are.
Couple that with the human need for acceptance by everyone and their teacup poodle, its obvious how this all came down, even as we ignore indefinitely. I decided to challenge myself to fix it from my end. If we can all band together to "go green" we can all "go real", too.
Those individuals-you know who they are/if you are one-that ring loudest and clearest when relating do so by tactfully revealing thoughts and constructively evaluating situations without fear or delusional misgivings clouding their head. It's not what you say, it's how you say it. If we pass that down to even the simplest interactions, and trust in our perspective in that moment, we can dig a tunnel to truth and be set free. If what you say is meant to help, any momentary offense will be forgotten when they come out the other side, better for it.
In other words, "Probity ain't just fun on a Saturday night, it's a way of life." You know, something sassy like that.
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